Carter Anthony’s Birth Story: Someday (March 15) The Prince Will Come
I am so happy to finally be able to share my birth story with you guys because it really is one to remember. I recall like it was yesterday, the week that I gave birth; my due date was March 19, but the prince ended up coming 4 days early. I remember the feelings (emotionally and physically), what I did to prepare for the big moment, and everything that led up to it.
I had went for my regular prenatal appointment on March 8th, and my OB was jumping up and down so excited that when she examined me I was already 2 cm dilated. I remember the feeling (going to throw up). I was so happy but so nervous at the same time, I couldn’t stop crying. She said you can go at anytime, so call me if you feel anything and I’ll meet you at the hospital (we had talked about how she HAD to be there to deliver my son, she was so amazing throughout my pregnancy, I wouldn’t have anyone else be a part of this special day). I went through the weekend; I was still working and I was feeling so tired, extremely huge, and just anxiously awaiting the prince's arrival.
Monday March 12 came around, my OB was on call in the hospital so she wanted me to go there to see her and evaluate me (mind you I felt nothing at this point so I knew I was just going to be sent home). The nurses and staff were absolutely amazing. I was hooked up to monitors and I remember them saying “Alexa how was that contraction"... I’m like contraction what?! I felt nothing!!! My doctor came in and examined me. "Nope, still 2 cm” she said. In that moment I was relieved... yet kind of disappointed; I had the choice to either be induced or wait it out. I chose to not be induced because I wanted everything to just happen naturally, I felt that’s what our bodies are made for. So I headed home and went about my day.
Fast forward to Tuesday March 13, ok now we’re getting somewhere! That day I was doing "last minute things" around the house and for the nursery (actually doing a lot, which worked in my favor). Throughout the entire labor process, walking and being on your feet really help you. Wednesday night I got out of the shower and I just remember being so overwhelmed and scared and texting one of my best friends, Marisa, the entire night (like seriously panicking). When I went to the hospital Monday, they had told me signs to look for... and “kick counting” which is 10 kicks every 2 hours. Carter had always been an active baby, I always felt him kicking away and moving. That night I didn’t feel close to that amount. I was very nervous, I was in my room sitting at my vanity and crying because all these bad thoughts were flooding my head. As I was texting my friends (who always came to the rescue), they agreed I was ok but if I really didn't feel at ease I should go to the emergency room.
I ran out of my room, hysterical, and my mom was in the living room asking what was wrong. I told her that we needed to go, and I was texting my doctor too at that point because I was so upset. She woke my dad and we were on the way. I was crying the entire time and just could not deal with what “could of been happening.” I got to the hospital and as soon as I was hooked up to the monitor where you hear the heartbeat... I felt instant relief. They took me for an ultrasound to make sure everything was normal. The tech made me so feel much better and said “you know you’re at the finish line, and at this stage there really isn’t a whole lot of room for him to move around anymore but everything looks great”. Hearing those words made me feel so at ease. I was able to go home still anxiously waiting for him to be here.
Later Wednesday night comes around (11 or 12 pm) and I start feeling these pains. I remember thinking to myself “false alarm, you’re really trying to play tricks on mommy now”. Oh it was no false alarm, I did not sleep an ounce that night because the contractions started to get more and more intense to the point where no position that I was in was comfortable at all.
6am, Thursday March 15 (spoiler alert: the prince makes his grand entrance). I hear my mom getting up so I waddle my way to the kitchen and say “It’s time, we have to go!” My contractions were 1-2 minutes apart (I was timing them exactly) so she woke my dad and it was go time. I yelled for them to take my bag and his diaper bag (which had been packed about 2 months in advance, of course). I let my OB know we were on the way. Mind you, I was supposed to see her in the office that morning for my routine checkup. On the drive there, I was crazy, texting my closest friends (who all had bets on when he was going to come, and actually spoke into the universe that he would be here the 15th or the 16th knowing my due date was the 19th). I told them this is really happening now so you all better be there! I get to the main lobby of the hospital, waddling my way in, and I remember the receptionist asking if I needed a wheelchair and at that point I could barely stand, the pain was so intense. I was put in the evaluation room hooked up to the monitors once again, and was checked. I was 3 cm coming in. So they had me walk around the maternity ward for 3 hours!!! And as the time went on, the pain was increasing to the point where I had to clutch the side rails and try and breathe through it. Luckily I had my mom by my side throughout it all. Everyone in my life was anxiously waiting and trying to get through their day as fast as possible just so they could be there for that special moment (best feeling). After walking around I had only progressed 1 cm. I was like that’s it! All this pain for 1 cm!!! It finally came to the point where they were admitting me to my labor and delivery suite, and the process was really starting then. My amazing doctor was checking in on me every hour, and said as soon as she was done with her last patient she would be coming to deliver my son (yay/almost threw up) because there was no way I was making it past 4 pm that afternoon. As soon as they got me hooked me up (again with the damn wires) the contractions were becoming stronger and stronger, lasting for longer periods of time and so close together.
With each contraction I prayed as I clutched the side of the bed. Tip for new mamas: PRAYER. Praying helped me from day 1, and got me through my entire pregnancy, labor, and delivery. God truly is so good. By this point I was begging for the epidural (originally I did not want it because I was so terrified). They called the anesthesiologist in; I remember her babbling on about God knows what (I couldn’t pay attention at all, the pain was too intense and I didn’t really give one fuck at that moment). Thankfully she was excellent, as well as my nurses. I definitely couldn’t have done it without them. I got the epidural when I was 7 cm (felt nothing afterwards and was finally comfortable). As soon as I got it, they broke my water (didn’t feel that either). My biggest fear was getting the epidural, but my nurse had stood in front of me, holding my shoulders, telling me to breathe through every contraction that was now nonstop. I was so scared that I was not going to be able to stay still, but it was two seconds literally and very simple. My OB said once you feel like you have to take the "biggest shit of your life” (ah, motherhood) that’s when you know it’s time.
20 minutes passed and she came rushing in to do her final check. I was ready. She went to put her scrubs on, the Prince was finally going to make his entrance!!! I was so anxious and excited at the same time. Within 20 minutes or so I went from 7 cm to 10 cm. The entire time I was FaceTiming, texting, you name it! Everyone was like “Lex you’re in labor are you going to like FaceTime while you’re pushing too?” One of my best friends was coming from Ohio that night; I was so sad she missed the birth but grateful that she was able to make it by the next morning to see her nephew (yes, all my friends are aunties).
Moments away from pushing, my doctor said you'll feel a great amount of pressure, I’ll be back. I was like umm well you better hurry because I’ll be pushing without you!!! Another one of my best friends, Deana, and Marisa too (who couldn’t be in the room during this whole thing because they would of been on the floor) were in the waiting room for their beautiful nephew to arrive. My mom was right by my side and held my hand through every contraction, and my leg for every push. I am beyond grateful for her. I was sooo ready to meet my baby boy. At this point I had an oxygen mask on (moments before every contraction I heard his heart rate drop and hearing that made me so anxious) I was completely out of it, I ripped the mask off and actually ripped my gown off too (fuck it, send it). It was intense, I felt like I was going to pass out. It was truly the craziest sensation. I had the best team that I could have imagined in there with me, and within 10 minutes of pushing he was here. March 15, 2018 at 3:55 pm this little angel sent straight from heaven was here. I cried while I kissed my beautiful baby for the first time. I could not believe he was actually here, the feeling was so surreal. At that moment, time had froze and all I saw was him and from that moment on I finally knew what love was, and that it was going to be me and him forever.
Becoming a mother is an indescribable feeling. All the backlash that I have received (opinions on how I was crazy for doing this, that I’m never going to find love because I have a son, and that I don’t have the means to support my child) no longer mattered. I proved each and every one of these wrong, and I wouldn’t have my life any other way. Being a single mom is challenging at times (I definitely learn something new everyday) but it’s so worth it. Throughout this entire experience, I wouldn’t have been able to get through it without my amazing friends (Natalie, Kuki, Marisa, Deana, Rosa, Brittani and my longtime friend Victoria who lives in Florida) and of course my family (I love you all so much). The fact that me and one of my closest friends experienced it together made it so much more special. I am extremely thankful for my OB and nurses, they truly made labor and birth so much easier. I was extremely nervous and didn’t know what to expect. Also, with the grace of God, my beautiful baby boy was brought into this world quickly (what I prayed for) and safely. I couldn’t have asked for more; the power of prayer really goes a long way. Don’t feel discouraged when things don’t go as planned, becoming a mother gives you an unimaginable amount of strength. I hope my story inspires others, that you can do it on your own. Even though it may be scary it is SO possible. Being a woman and a mama is a superpower, don’t ever forget that! I am beyond happy that I got to share my thoughts and feelings, and the biggest day of my life, one I will cherish forever.